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Incredible Times And Nobody's Happy
 Posted
10/8/2009 4:00:00 PM
Nobody is a privacy maven more than yours truly and I hate the CCTV's that have blanketed Britain and parts of Europe and all the live-action cameras that police now seem to use in place of ass-scratching and donut gulping.
But I love Google Street View.
I loved it when I booked a hotel in San Diego. I love it when I'm cruising Las Vegas Blvd and moving from nighttime to daylight in just a block. It's not perfect. But it puts me in the place.
I'm not checking out the children I want to snatch off the street for a couple of decades of dungeon fun or remembering what homes may be empty during the day for a little break and enter action.
When I was checking out Lord Roberts Public School last night having virtually "walked" the mile and a half from my old Kennedy Road apartment building over a bridge on CNR tracks and through a woods to the school where I spent 1965 through 1969, I could smell the classrooms and wet socks. One listener suggested this would be a traumatizing moment for any victim of abuse. My suggestion: stay the freak away from any Google Street View where you were abused. Is that too hard to do or is re-victimizing yourself an industry now?
This is tech that would have changed my world in 1965. Our world is wonderful, times are amazing and nobody's happy.
Google is evil and part of the grey lizard conspiracy to sap our bodily fluids. Google's Street View is part of the New World Order plan to track our lives minute by minute to....I don't know...to inform the Queen that I'm buying porn....or going to the Pizza Pizza.
A number of Torontonians shifted their tin foil hats yesterday and joined the anti-Google Street View campaign to demand that their homes, their streets, their neighbourhoods be removed from the database so they can....I don't know, they can stop being filmed OUTSIDE their residence hunking inside worrying about terrorism, pedophiles, break and enter artists and radio stations that demand you pay them to participate by texting in their programming (CFRB CFRB CFRB, there, I said it).
Most people who don't have a serious amino acid deficiency in their diet and can be employed during the daytime are celebrating Street View for it's novelty and fun. And I'll add the amazing technological breakthrough this gives anybody who went to school relying only on 2D atlases and maps.
These are amazing times, tin foil hat people. And you're nothing but pale, nervous Nellys.
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Mike Stafford
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